What do you call an arab with a shemagh on his head and a gun A man who is concerned for his wellbeing and family

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How do you confuse a blonde? You ask her a question.

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What do old people really like? Anal sex.

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What is the difference between a joke, and an antijoke? A joke is actually funny.

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A man walks into a bar and asks "Where is your bathroom?" He is directed towards the restroom, where he then covers himself in toilet paper and calls himself a moose.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

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Why was the black man eating a banana? Because bananas are an excellent source of potassium.

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a cheetah? A fictional animal.

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What did the Neo-Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

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What's the square root of four? Two.

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What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

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Why did the baker have brown hands: Because he was black

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Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

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What happened when the asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will it be? Sarah Jessica Parker replies, i'll have 4 cosmopolitans for me and my friends.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A man opens his refrigerator and takes out a can of soda. He returns back to his living area and continues watching television.

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How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

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How do you make a plumber stop sagging? Tickle his crack

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Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

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Rosa Parks is going to be here if she gets to the bus on time!

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*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

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Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? He had heard from a mutual friend that his ex-girlfriend, who he had recently broken up with, would be present at the same party and to avoid an awkward encounter he chose not to go.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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