Take this and put it- No.

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Q: What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? A: They both have handlebars except for the duck!

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2 tomatoes walk across a road tomato 1 gets hit by a car tomato 2 gets confused, because tomatoes don't have legs and therefore cannot "walk across a road" And furthermore, a tomato does not have a brain, and thus cannot get confused.

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I was sitting next to a man with jelly in one ear and peanut butter in the other, so I turned to him and said "Are you a trifle deaf?" and he said "No, I'm mentally ill."

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What weights more than a 300 pound man? A 400 pound man.

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Knock knock Who's there Police

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what did the fish say when he was eaten by a shark nothing fish cant talk

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do you know that joke? hmm no.. yaa life!

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What did the gay guy get at the grocery store? A tub of Häagen-Dazs ice cream because he thought he deserved a treat.

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On the 12th day of Christmas my true love gave to me nothing because I'm single

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69

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how do you spend all your money you go buy stuff

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Why did the homeless man get a house key cut? He didn't he's homeless.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care?

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why did susie fall off the swing? she had no arms and no legs. knock knock who's there? not susie

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What do you call girls that can run faster than me? Virgins

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There were two ducks in a bathtub. One duck says to the other, "Pass me the soap" The other duck replies, "What do i look like, a toaster?"

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Who's black, white and Asian at the same time? A panda.

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Why don't elephants eat bananas? Because they don't have opposable thumbs.

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A woman walks into a bar.

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Why do people like anti jokes? Because their f****** funny as hell

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What should you do if you come across a slut with a fork up her @ss and a gun in her hand? Do not look at her and walk away.

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Why was Ray Charles always smiling? He was Happy

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A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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