What's worse than stubbing your toe? Dyeing of cancer.

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pickle sniffer

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Minecraft!

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Why did the New York Times cancel Otis Redding's subscription? Because he died.

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Knock knock Who's there? I eat myp.

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What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications in the background while you're trying to play a game of Jetman so it starts lagging.

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How do you escape prison? Kill everyone in it hen once you have escaped find their families and viciously murder them. Are they going the send you back to prison? No because you will kill everyone.

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One day, a mother was speaking with her daughters. "Mommy," the first one said, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we brought you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second daughter said, "Why did you name me Rose?" ""Because when we brought you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMBWWAAAAGGGH!" the last daughter cried. She was born with severe special needs and is incapable of coherent speech.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when the elephants were coming? Here come the elephants! What did Jane say when the elephants were coming? Here come the plums! (She was color blind.)

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What do blacks and the night have in common? Their both worse than when it's light

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What's the difference between a duck? Nothing, they're both the same.

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Oh yeah? Well you're as gay as this joke!

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Kid: knock knock Orphan: whos there? Kid: not your parents

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If a quiz is a quizzical what is a test? A testicle

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What did the Bishop say to the pebble? Wash my car

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What has wheels and flies? A wheel that I have altered so it can fly

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What did the hungry man do? He ate.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? yea, neither has he.

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How are trees and friends alike? They are both subject to fall when struck with an axe.

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What did the gay man do last night? Had a curry

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Why did John kill Maris? Because Maris killed his family.

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How you your turn a trashcan into a semi-automatic AK-47? You don't. But ask the irishman who just said "hello" to you.

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Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

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What did OJ Simpson say to the blonde? "Don't worry, I'm not going to murder you"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops