why did the little girl fall out of the tree? She didnt have any arms

An Asian fails their maths exam.

Chuck Norris walks into a bank. There is a long line to get to the teller. Chuck Norris waits patiently in line.

What do you call a black man in space? An astronaut.

Why is a building called a building when it's already been built? My pinky is pink and my liver helps me live.

How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? Depends on how big the lightbulb is

What did the kid with no arms and no legs gets for Christmas? Cancer

WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN DANII AND SCAFFHOLDING? ONLY ONE STILL HAS A POLE 1 LIKE = 1 TEAR FOR DANII

What's Chris Benoit up to? Just hangin' with his family

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, you're entire family is dead.

What did the dinosaur and John Wayne say to the Easter Bunny? Nothing, they're both dead and the Easter Bunny isn't real.

Why was 97 afraid of 98? Because 98,99, 100!

What did the girl say when she arrived at the party? "I like what you did with the furniture!"

An asian, mexican, and a black guy walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "get the hell out"

knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had Gonorrhea.

"I see," said the blind man to the deaf man.

How can you shed 10 pounds in one day? Get your legs amputed.

Blonde: I'm sad. Brunette: Why? Blonde: I walked into a bar just to see my boyfriend having a drink with another woman, Brunette: I'm so sorry,

A. Knock, Knock B. Come in

Why didn't Charlie Sheen lose? Because he's always winning.

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

Why couldn't Harry Potter get a job at Mc Donalds? Because he isn't real.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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