what do you call a cow with no legs? ground beef

if you can raed tihs steence it menas you are ceelvr eugnoh to uendnrstad tihs: no sex cusaes dgdoy eeys

My penis is so big that some women find it uncomfortable.

Am I a cat? No, I am a human; cat's cannot type.

What is a person who can hold there breath for an hour? Dead

What's worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Ebola

whats the difference between a white kid a nd a puerto rican kid? one smells fine and the other one smells like he walked out of a butcher shop that sells cigars and cheap prostitutes

Friends are like trees. If you hit them with an axe enough times, they'll fall over.

If there are 3 apples, and Johnny takes away 3 of them, how many apples does Johnny have? None, because Johnny got hit by a train.

homework

A man walked into a bar because he worked there.

How come Michael Jackson couldn't get into the petting zoo? It was closed.

A Man buys a Prius. Hated it.

What do you call a joke without a punchline?

What d u tell Simba when he's moving to slow? Muvasa

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Batman, Superman, Spiderman and Wonder Woman walk into a bar. The bartender decides to ruin the joke by saying nothing.

How many of amanda todd's frinds does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question, she doesn't have any

Knock Knock Whos There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Radley.

Why did the jew die Really...

Black People

How do you get a pirate out of your seat? Politely ask him to move for you were there first.

Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? One has a complex circulatory system the other is a pizza.

Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because she had no legs. Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. What did Sally get for Christmas? Cancer. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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