A blonde, a brunette and a red head engage in a discussion on World politics. The brunette says she would like to see politicians paying more attention to the environment. The red head says she would like to see improvements in the economy. The blonde says she has to poop.

your mama is so greasy she should go take a bath

"The hills are alive..." Impossible, hills can never be alive.

The Barackness Monster

How did the two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for half an hr? They didn't and they died.

-if you're American in the kitchen, British in the living room, what are you in the bathroom? -in the bathroom.

Knock Knock Whos there? It's me your mom you dumbass and let me in

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

What you reading? reading?

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Oh, then I'm not opening the door.

Stephen Hawkings viewed porn as a child

What is the secret to winning football games? Score the most points.

Whats green and has wheels? A green honda

What do you call you're mum? Depends who's reading it or just mum

Whats worse than an offended chicken walking around with a squirrel stapled to its back? A crusty old man with hepatitis peeing on 10 babies.

A jewish lady is cleaning a house to make some extra money. Its great that she can still find work in this economy.

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

What did the fat man with scissors do? Cut off the foreskin of your penis.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well, there is no way to accurately estimate this number being that 1.woodchucks in fact do not chuck wood and 2. there is no time frame given for said action to take place

Wanna hear my impersonation of a homosexual man? I am attracted to men.

Whats worse than a little kid falling. Him getting vigorously raped by his father every night.

What happened to the dog who lost its legs? It Died.

guys stop with the jewish jokes anne frainkly its getting old

What happened to those who survived the attack on Hiroshima? They were killed in Nagasaki

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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