"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "God" "Then come right in!"

A man walks into a bar, and he says, "ow,".

What did the cop say to the people watching the house fire? All right nothing to see here jokes over

what do you call a black man on tv? an actor

Have you ever heard about the black man who got shot my a goat? Neither did I.

An Irishman and an Englishman are having a heated conversation about Rugby in a pub. Another Irish comes to the pub.. He is promptly given a bar stool and menu so that he can order.

Why did the tissue dance? Because it had a boggie

Why is pi? Because circles.

Why did the boy not turn in his homework? Because his pet ate it.

Your so fat that you have a 75% chance increase of dying from congenital heart failure.

Who am I? Your name is Harvey Jackson. Let's get you dressed so we can go downstairs for dinner. Nurse Holland will be helping you in a few moments.

If a fish eats fish bait, and a dog eats dog bait, what does a master eat? Anything he feels like eating at the given moment provided it is in accordance to his diet and beliefs.

Is the capitol of Michigan pronounced DEE-troit or de-TROIT? It's pronounced Lansing.

A bear walked into a bar, unfortunately there were no survivors.

What's neon green and has 69 legs? Nothing that I know of, but it would be an interesting creature

A man walks into a bar.....OW!

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

Roses are white Violets are black I'm colorblind That is sad

How do you keep a black man out of your back yard? Tell him to go away.

Hey I just met you, and this is Crazy, but I think I Love You, so have my baby! ;)

Cleveland winning something

who looks like justin bieber and is really cool? george darling but i lied about him being cool.

How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? 3.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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