How do you make a plumber stop sagging? Tickle his crack

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Why did the man mow his lawn without his shirt on? Because it was very hot out.

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i hate anti-jokes ;)

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It was a stormy night and a stinking boy was running away from the co-op, he was clutching onto his pocket and constantly looked over his shoulder.... panting the boy reaches for a rusty door handle he opens the door quickly and shuts it behind him. "mam i got tea" said the boy "thanks david we will eat tonight for once" said a big chinned pharaoh.

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Q:What's red and fluffy? A: A blue rock, if blue were red and rocks were fluffy

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What's the easiest way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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Test

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What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza One is an ethnicity derived from Africa and One is an Italian dish that is well'ly known in all four corners of the world.

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? The person knocking at your door.

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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Dislike if you shag sheep ;)

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What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Robin get in the car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

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Why did the black man get the grape soda? It was the only soda left.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

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An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

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Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

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A black man walked into a bar. Had a drink, and left.

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cats are afraid of dogs. mice are afraid of cats. elephants are afraid of mice. bf-2 fighter jets are afraid of elephants. is this true?

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*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

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What did the nurse say to the man who got an erection while being given a sponge bath? She assured him it was a normal reaction and moved on to clean his arms.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Yo mama is so hairy, because she's arab.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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