How does a black guy who murdered his wife get out of jail? He serves his sentence and is allowed to return back home.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Dislike if you shag sheep ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why do vampires suck the blood of their victims? Because blood is very nutritious and provides more iron for heamoglobin.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

thumb_up thumb_down -101

What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +182

You should periodically review the most up-to-date version of the Terms of Service. Oh you.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

what did the dog do when he saw the flea?he ate it because he didn't know what would happen next

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A horse walks into a bar, it gets a concussion. -mattobrado

thumb_up thumb_down +8

It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than death? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why does Marcus keep playing dumb games instead of doing his goelogy. No one knows.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the girl cross the road ? to get run over by a flee of running cows

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Shoes, socks, and mittens.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What the black guy say to the Jew during the blizzard? I think it's snowing.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How do you kill a baby quickly? The better question is why kill a baby quickly?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A man walks into a bar. - - - - - - - - -

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Why was the black man eating a banana? Because bananas are an excellent source of potassium.

thumb_up thumb_down -196

Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

thumb_up thumb_down +103

A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

thumb_up thumb_down +75

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had an appointment with his hair stylist. Just kidding chicken don't have hair.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops