How do you kill a ninja? Shoot it.

What has wheels and flies? A wheel that I have altered so it can fly

How do you make a sandwich? You don't, you have a girl do it for you.

Two women are sitting quietly in a corner, minding their own business.

A muslim, a jew, and a black man walk into a bar, the bartender asks what they would like to drink, after respnding, paying and receiving their drinks, they sit down to drink them. What a lovely scene of ethnic diversity

911 joke ? now thats just plane rude.

What's big, black and hard to swallow? A bowling ball.

Man 1: Nock-nock Man 2: Please leave my place of residence

Whats worse than being a student? Being raped.

Doctor: "I'm sorry, but your son has Hepatitis B. Asian Parent: "Why he has Hepatitis B? Why he not get the Hepatitis A plus?"

whats worse than a 6 dead babies in a dumpster? You were babysitting them.

What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? An amputation.

I what's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? I don't have 10 watermelons in my basement.

like this joke for a free ipod nano or a dead baby ?

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

Why was there a black guy in the back of a police car? He was caught stealing

A young girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges a few minutes later unharmed and goes about her day.

How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

"Knock, Knock," a man called out. A child threw open the door and peered out at him. "Why didn't you just knock instead of saying 'knock knock'?" Flustered, the man couldn't come up with an answer, and the child promptly closed the door, locked it, and returned to her previous activities.

Why did the surfer surf in the ocean without a surfboard? Either he was mentally challenged, simply dreaming, a fish, or most likely did not have a surfboard.

Why did the little girl die Because she was kidnapped by a rapist, and defiled repeatedly, and then to get a ransom from her family the kidnapper slowly pulled out her fingernails and toenails, and sent them to the family the same thing happened with her fingers, toes, hands, feet, arms, legs, teeth, tounge, hair, and eyes, then she died of blood loss after nearly 2 months of torture.

- Are you thinking what I'm thinking B1? - No.

A blonde walks into a store and tells the clerk "I'd like to buy that microwave". The clerk says "we don't sell things to blondes.". The blonde comes in the shop the next day with a brown wig on and says "I'd like to buy that microwave". The clerk says "we don't sell things to blondes". The blonde asks how he knew she was a blonde. The clerk replies, "I can see flyaway strands of your hair from the top of your wig and the synthetic hair material of the wig is not convincing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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