A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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How do you stop a charging rhinocerous? Nuke africa.

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Whats funnier than 24? 25

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A woman walks into the bathroom and hears the sound of moaning. Not sure what to do she looks around and sees couples as far as the eye can see. She quickly turns to the woman and man standing next to her and asks what is going on here?! The woman says can't you read this is not a bathroom this is a public sex room! Only an idiot would ask that question. In shock the woman takes another look around and she spots someone she finds familiar. When she walks closer she finds that it is her boyfriend and that he is with another woman. Furious she walks up to him and slaps him in the face. The boyfriend looks at her and says sorry your sex just got old. Furious she says to him we never had sex!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get the results of his AIDS test

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Robocop and T-800 argue over who can run the fastest, Robocop claims he is the fastest, while T-800 says that he is the fastest. To settle things once and for all, they start a race. At first T-800 seems to be leading Then the T-800 is leading by a great distance. moments later the T-800 has a huge lead. But then suddenly, without any warning, the race shifts! T-800 is now leading only by a great distance! Yet in a amazing, and completely unexpected plot-twist. T-800 wins! Moral: :O

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Rose are red Violets are blue And I really hate you Friends?????

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How did little Timmy die? He was ripped to shreds by a violent badger.

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Why did Dom stop smoking He didnt I lied

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Why did the car go down the road? Someone was driving it. Why did the car stop? Because he suddenly fell and had a stroke.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Why did the football coach go to the bank? To make a deposit.

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Why was the kid crying? Cause he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Q: why do irish people like swimming A: because it's fun

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A fat guy. - Louis

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Why'd the man go to jail? Because he had a piece of cheese.

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Womens rights

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What comes after 23? 24.

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What's worse than the holocaust? I'm a zebra so what is the holocaust.

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oh no, i've lost my tractor

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How many retarded mexicans can you fit in a smart car? Two.

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A man tells his wife to leave the kitchen

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Anywhere from 2-8, depending on the size of the vehicle.

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Guy 1: why are you such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most p***y

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops