The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of problems with money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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What's black, dangerous and sits in a tree ? A crow, with a machine gun !

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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yous are all f u c k i n g dumb like rat kavanagh

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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What does a pelican and a taxman have in common? Both are bipedal, both are carbon-based lifeforms that procreate by DNA replication, both in all probablility eat fish, both have survival instinct, both require fresh water for hydration, both have five senses; vision, hearing, touch, taste and smell, both are capable of at least limited cognition, and both can turn aggressive when provoked.

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why does Chuck Norris never get wet in the rain? Because he has a very serviceable umbrella

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Knock Knock Who's there? No one. You're imagining things.

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what do you call a black person in the dark? ........invisible

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A man is on a date. His philandering causes a bitter divorce.

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Luck is not real. But the dismembered body in my basement is.

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Knock Knock trick or treats? here is the candies, have fun kids!

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What do a woman and a female dog have in common? They were both annoying so I put them down.

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What kind of car does Yoda drive? Nothing, Yoda doesn't exist.

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.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

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Hi

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Why did the man fall of the building? Someone shot both of his kneecaps.

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Siete inglesi quindi non sapete nemmeno cosa c'è scritto ? Succhiacapre che non siete altro.

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From the makers of Call of Duty 1, comes Call of Duty 2.

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Why John isn't smiling? Becouse he died yesterday

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Can you pass the soda? Sure.

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What do you call a black cop? Officer.

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Tell you something funny.

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(Guy)That's what she said. (His Girlfriend) And who is this she.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops