How do you trap a squirrel? You carefully set up a trap and place acorns in the trap.

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Chuck Norris is so tough, he trained diligently for many years and is now a widely respected martial artist

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What did little jimmy get for Christmas? A box containing the malevolent soul of a 10,000 year-old demon determined to torment his cat.

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What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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So 2 black guys walk into a bar and the bartender looks around and say "what will you fine gentlemen have?" and they order and payed their tab and could not have been more courteous, amirite?

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Polite say "Hey you, get out of that tree."

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Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

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What do you call a black guy running from the cops? Nothing. He was out for his morning jog and he happened to run by the police.

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69

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HEY YOU!!!!

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What do you call girls that can run faster than me? Virgins

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My life :(

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As little Timmy crossed the finish line his heart raced with excitement he had just won the big race. Later he and his family went home to celebrate they had pizza and chips and soft drinks. Then they played scrabble and watched spiderman 2. After that Timmy went to sleep. When his parents found him that morning they mourned and mourned because their hero little Timmy was still asleep.

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They say those with anti-humour are the wisest.

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You know what's funny? Lot's of things.

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A duck flew calmly through the air and landed softly on a beautiful lake, where he was then shot for trespassing.

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What do you call a black guy and a mexican guy running down a hill? Two good friends enjoying the countryside together.

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What do you call a fat person with no friends? An individual who is over the expected weight of a person their age, who finds themselves disliked by people in their s surroundings, possibly due to their weight problem, but also it may be because of any personality defects they may have, or they simply may prefer to be alone.

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Knock knock. Who's there You are.

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll you have?" and the duck says "Quack". The bartender is then promptly fired and committed to the nearest mental institution for thinking that ducks can talk and order beer.

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Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: I have no Idea what you would call cheese which isn't yours. However, it seems quite trivial to take time to discuss a nonsensical topic such as cheese which isn't yours.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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