What did the milk say to the oatmeal? I came from a cow nipple.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I said who's there? The man opens the door to find there was no one there and begins to shake in fear as his schizophrenia is getting worse.

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Sidney Crosby comes face-to-face with Alex Ovechkin. The Penguins were playing the Capitals.

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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Q: How did the black man die? A: He got hit by a car, and we all know that this is painful.

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Whats worse then Justin Bieber? It's a trick question, there's is nothing worse than her

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In Soviet Russia, you have no rights!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Does this smell like chloroform to you?

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1 man walks up to a tiger and eats cheese toast with brownies and butter and wonders about the stars the end james

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fuzzy wuzzy was a bear fuzzy wuzzy had no hair so fuzzy wuzzy wasn't fuzzy was he? yes

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What is the difference between Boyscouts and Jews? Boyscouts come home from camp.

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How did the man with no arms or legs cross the street? He didn't.

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Blonde: I'm sad. Brunette: Why? Blonde: I walked into a bar just to see my boyfriend having a drink with another woman, Brunette: I'm so sorry,

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she was dead.

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What is a Mexican's favorite restaurant? While the term "Mexican" encompasses a wide range of individuals and individual predilections, the most common cibarious preference would likely be a food that is reminiscent of his or her homeland; that is, what we refer to as Mexican food. An authentic nearby joint sporting such provisions would likely be the most common preference, but, as this description can only be traced on the local scale, a specific restaurant that covers a wider range of locations would be a more appropriate answer. Among the top choices are Taco Time and Taco Del Mar.

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Billy Cundiff.

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Whats worse than malaria? Dying from it.

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Shoulda had a V8 ...or not because I am severely allergic to tomato's.

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What is translucent and smells like a carrot ? A translucent carrot.

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Why didn't the blonde make it in a gun circle? The blonde yelled "Fire"

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Roses are Purple Chickens are gray I'm color blind You have cancer I'll see you in hell Ba bye now

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Matt is not funny.

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What's funnier than the world ending? Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder in a staring contest.

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third guy ducks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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