Did you hear about Helen Keller's dog? Neither did she.

Gun Control

Good question, probably because I cannot get enough focus to "put a spell" on anyone because of my allergy, I use "autocast" for the rest. "Put a spell" I have not heard that since I was 14, that's really oldschool, and kinda geeky, back then it was code talk... Which is also geeky unless it actually serves a good purpose. AAAND... I served my mandatory time in the army as a minesweeper, we got attacked by fucking allies because of a... Yeah, I killed, people on our same team, still bad people, they offed about everybody else until I showed up, long story short, yeah I offed four of them, but that's like ten years ago.. My turn, you really got a crush on me dont you?

What does 2 + 2 equal? 4

how many A.D.D. kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?lets go play!

Roses are red, But ravens are black, please go to China, and never come back!

I really might try and kill myself when I get home tonight.

why did the little boy put a bandaid on his knee. it doesn't really matter, he has cancer.

why is the black man black? because he isnit white

Q: Why can't dinosaurs talk? A: Because they are all dead.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms.

So I took this girl into my room we got in bed, We got under the covers and.... We had a rather delightful game of scrabble.

What is blue, around 30 cm long and makes women cry? Crib death!

What is white on the inside and red on the outside? An apple.

What happened to the blond that went to collage? She got her masters degree and became a brain surgeon.

Q: What did the boy say to his mum when he saw a Lion A: Hey mum that's a Lion

How do you kill half of Mexico? You use nuclear weapons in major cities.

Q: What did Stevie Wonder eat for dinner last night? A: Something consumable

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What's the difference between a turtle and a fish? Turtles aren't fish.

Why didn't Kurt Cobain drive to work on Monday? He killed himself.

How many Aumish farmhands does it take to operate a state of the art commercial laser-cutter? One,provided he has the relevant training and experience.

what do you call a kid without arms and legs? Freak

So joe diragi walks out of a gay bar...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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