I'M THE GRAPIST!! I'M GONNA GRAPE UR MOM AND UR DAD AND UR WHOLE FAMILY!!!

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What's invisble and smells like bananas? My mailbox.

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What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

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what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Someone threw birdseed.

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What do you call a man with 3 arms, 6 ears, 9 fingers, and a red clown nose? His name.

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SOPA gets passed and shuts down anti-joke because KFC claims the picture of the anti-joke chicken

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Take off your shoes.

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Two guys are walking down the street. One asks the other "Nice weather today, huh?" And the other responds "It sure is," and they both continue on with their days.

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What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face!

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Why 't the blonde dial 911? Because phones haven't had dials on them for at least 40 years or so. She can however punch it in on her keypad.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint the side of a building? I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

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Sticks and stones may break my bones and they can also break cars.

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so there was two ducks in a bathtub. one duck says to the other duck, "hey, can you pass me the soap? the other duck says no.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He had no limbs

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why can't helen keller drive? Because she is deaf and blind.

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Why was the Black Panther upset? Because racial tensions were high in the 60s.

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What do you call four friends spending a wild night in Las Vegas that they can't rember the next day? A rip off of the Hangover

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Ask him to come down.

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I nicknamed my diick "the truth" because the biitches can't handle it

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Doctor: Knock, Knock Woman: Who's there? Doctor: Interrupting Doctor Woman: Interupt- Doctor: You have cancer

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When is a Jew the sleepiest? Depends on the time really... some people sleep and wake up on different biological calendars.

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A viking walks into a bar, and orders 6 beers. the man working asks "why did you order so many beers?" the viking says"because one for me 6 brothers who were separated from me many years ago." then he leaves. the next morning the viking walks into the bar, and orders 5 beers.the man working says"im sorry for your loss." the viking says"what? oo no im just getting tierd of drinking!'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops