How do you kill half of Mexico? You use nuclear weapons in major cities.

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The only time your mother was ever considered "hot" was at her cremation.

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What did the homeless children get for christmas? Hypothermia

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Q: What did the boy say to his mum when he saw a Lion A: Hey mum that's a Lion

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Whats funnier than the Holocaust? Nothing.

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Why didn't Kurt Cobain drive to work on Monday? He killed himself.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Q: Why do so many people write "So a man walked into a bar" A: Because they lack the intellect to think of something creative, and still other peoples material.

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Why did you not just "put a spell" on her instead? And you are totally mean, ever actually killed someone?

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because Osama Bin Laden is dead.

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How many Aumish farmhands does it take to operate a state of the art commercial laser-cutter? One,provided he has the relevant training and experience.

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So joe diragi walks out of a gay bar...

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what do you call a kid without arms and legs? Freak

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Jersey Shore

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<3 ... it looks more like scissors than a heart...

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What's worse than a kid being bullied at school? A kid being bullied at school, to go home and be raped by his stepdad.

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What black and white and red all over? A panther I was lying about the red and white.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A jew is a person contending to the faith of Judaism, and a pizza is an Italian flat normally round or square baked good consisting of dough, tomato sauce, cheese and various spices, and is sometimes enjoyed with toppings such as meat or vegetables.

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Why was the human stronger than the dog? Because the dog had four legs and a mouth and a human has 2 legs, 2 arms, and is taller. Therefore, the human has more capabilites than the dog.

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Q: What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? A: They both have handlebars except for the duck!

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Q: What is better than sex? A: A relationship where you can be completely intimate with your partner

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There are 100 men enjoying a cruise to celebrate an important contract going through at their place of employment. The boat then suffers a major malfunction and tragically sinks to the bottom of the ocean, miles from any land masses. Not a single man died, how is this possible? They all used the lifeboats supplied on the boat and followed the standard procedure to deal with such a crisis.

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What did the iceberg say when Titanic crashed on it? "Yeah!"

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A Christian walks in into a bar . . . mitzvah.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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