A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What game will Helen Keller always win? A: Marco Polo. She is a fast swimmer.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hey we just met And this is crazy But my name's Kony And I stole your baby

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit in the back of the bus? Every seat wsa taken, and the back was her only option

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how do you starve a man who is on welfare? hide his food stamps under his work boots.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats hard and long? An erect penile shaft.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A mormon walks into a bar. He orders a caffeine free Coke.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many elephants can you fit in a car? depends how big the car is!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

your momma's so fat i almost didn't have sex with her.... almost.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Wanna go bike riding?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the man starve to death? Because his wife died

thumb_up thumb_down +6

--Knock Knock Who's there? --Banana Banana who? --Knock Knock You just said that --Sorry i have Alzheimer's

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock knock Who's there? Doorbell repairman

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Wats rong with yo leg.....

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats worse than a pile of dead baby's? Being raped by a giant scorpion. Well that escalated quickly. Also i'm gonna call the cops.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q. What is small, ugly and severely asthmatic? A. My younger brother. Jimmy.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

There was this cat, and he was walking down this long road, knowing a dog lived on 45 lake avenue. So the cat was very careful while walking by that house so the dog and his diqqas wouldnt chase the cat, named pat. So like a rogue in the arathi basen lodge, he made his way over the stone wall and ran as quickly as he could through the muddy path of dirt. This cat was also swagged out of control, so he had mad bitches. That is where Pat was heading....... to his mad bitches. He had never met these bitches, but bought them offline on a p0rn website that said he would become the man if he purchased the mad hot bitches. When he found the bitches, he shit himself. The bitches were female dogz. if you read this whole paragraph, a fraction of your soul has been ripped out of you. UMAD? ˜´??

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Did you hear about Helen Keller's dog? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Yo mamma's so fat it's a legitimate medical condition

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Thumbs this down

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the black guy get kicked out of school? Because he was poor academically.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops