I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!!! LOUD NOISES!!!

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A turtle that couldn't swim walked to Japan.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. My thumb is red because I accidentally put it in the toaster.

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guys ive got a TANK under my house a septic tank

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(402)217-6102 that is Jesse

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What's worse than 10 babies in one trash can? One baby in 10 trash cans.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint the side of a building? I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

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What do you get when you cross a joke and a rhetorical question?

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roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you wh*re

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Are you from Africa? Because you're black.

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A brown haired girl and a blonde girl are driving through a cornfield. Because of this illegal activity, they are sent to court and given 8 years in the state prison.

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OY SHIT ITS YOUR MOM!!!

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I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

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What's gray and comes in buckets? An elephant

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What dog keeps the best time? All dogs will keep reasonably good time as far as their care is concerned, if they have a stable home routine.

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do want to hear a joke? Women's rights

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how do you kill a blonde? hit her in the back repeatedly with a crowbar

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Why was the horse sad? Because it seen a Tesco van in the distance.

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third guy ducks.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What did the fat man with scissors do? Cut off the foreskin of your penis.

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knock knock who's there your family just died your family just died who? -.-

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doctor doctor i have been having a sore head recently . doctor : have you hurt your head yes

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A tightly dressed woman walks up to a man and asks if he wants a good time they go out for dinner and have a lot in common and agree to meet again in the near future

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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