Roses are Black. Violets are Green. im going to go cut myself now

What did the homeless children get for christmas? Hypothermia

Why couldn't Jenny speak right? Cause she had autism.

Why can't you fly? Cause Ruddell says so.

A dyslexic paraplegic walks into a bra

What's Big, Brown and really Runny ??? It doesn't matter anymore, i'll just leave the Toilet !!

What did the fat girl say to the good looking guy? Nothing. She didn't have the self-confidence to go up to him.

Q:whats comes back to life and says RAR A;jesus

i put the STD in S.T.u.D all i need is U!!! F_CK all i need is U!!!!!!! o.0 lolzzz

Why wasn't there an elevator in the rainforest? The rainforest is not capable of managing an elevator because an elevator does in fact require an energy source which is also not capable in a rainforest. The rainforest is filled with animals and is not filled with humans which would make having an elevator in the rainforest useless because the main use of an elevator is to transport humans. The animals in the rainforest would not be able to operate the elevator because using an elevator for them would be advance while humans using elevators is second nature.

A baby elephant steps on a lego. First thought, auch, huh ?! Actually, the lego was fine with it and so was the baby elephant. Now they're married and are expecting a baby legophant.

How do you give a women more freedom? Shoot her in the face with a shotgun.

Whats bloody and wrinkly? Your nans fanny

I scream. You scream. We all scream and huddle in a corner of our first grade classroom because of a masked gunman.

A man went to the doctor with a strange complaint. "Well it's like this Doc, when I drive to work in the morning through the country lanes I start to sing 'The green green grass of home'. If I see a cat then it's 'What's new, pussy cat?'. It's so embarrassing, even when I'm asleep and dreaming, I still keep singing. Last night, it was 'Delilah', and my wife was not amused!" "Yes, it would apear that you have the early symptoms of Tom Jones syndrome." "Well I've never heard of that, is it common?" asked the man. "Yes," replied the doctor, "It is very uncommon."

Ask me if I am a bus. Are you a bus? No.

Q: What's the difference between sheetrock and drywall? A: nothing. It's just two names for the same thing.

How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

Why did John stay home from school? He died.

Teagan Doherty, stop making jokes, thanks

Q:what do you call a black man flying a plane? A: a pilot

why do girraffe's have long necks? because my foot is so far up all their asses that it hits their head, pushing it away from the body.

the asian kid gets an F

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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