A scientist walks into a bar. His forehead becomes swollen.

how do u keep a stupid person in suspense? how

If you give a homeless man a fish he eats for the night, if you teach him to fish then he probably won't be able to feed himself anyway, he is too poor to afford a pole.

There once was a man from Kentucky...then he raped everyone in sight... THE END

Why didn't the dinosaur cross the road? Because they are extinct and roads did not exist when they were alive.

A cat jumped out of a tree. It died.

Why did the kid tell yo mama jokes to insult other kids? His mom had just committed suicide due to depression caused by the kid's bad habits.

Oh," the boy says. "Well BUENOS DIAS to you too!!!

What's funnier than 68 69

What do you call a woman with a black eye and several cuts on her face? The police and perhaps a social help hotline. She now feels safer and more secure and will go on to lead a happy life thanks to you speaking out on her behalf.

Roses are red Violets are blue My friend has diabetes Stop posting diabetic jokes

whats worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts. whats worse than 2 holocausts? i rotten banana. whats worse than a rotten banana? 2 rotten bananas.

how do you fit 100 babies in a bowl? with a blender. how do you get them back out of the bowl? with tortila chips.

Roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, get out of the garden it's time for lunch.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Someone else's.

A boy was crying. He had been abused and beaten by his parents, and thrown in his room. He was devastated, and wanted to kill himself. He tossed and turned in bed, and moaned himself to sleep. When he awoke, he felt a chill up his spine, noticing that all of his blankets had been torn off of his bed, leaving only him and his mattress. He open the window, and jumped out of his three story building. Luckily, his bedroom was on the first floor. He ran away, and found a rich family that loved him so much until a week later, a murderer came and killed everyone, including him.

Unnnnnnnn

What's worse than a murderer? Two murderers.

A Jewish man walks into a grocery store. He purchases the items he needs and leaves.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because seven, eight, nine.

Why did the nerd cross the road?? BAZINGA!!!! xD

An ordinary man, much like your friend Brad from that one place where you used to hang out, was walking along one night, much like that night last week, and saw a star. He then wished upon that star...and kept walking.

A man using Apple Maps walks into a bar. Or maybe a hospital... or possibly a church.

What's worse than getting stabbed Getting stabbed two times

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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