Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Q: What happened to the blonde who tried to commit suicide? A: She died.

Roses are red Violets are blue If you came 'cause GameGrumps Fuck you.

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic, so to make his activities in the bar into a joke would be disrespectful and inconsiderate.

Me and my pet lion just took a trip to his homeland of africa. It is also worthwhile to note I'm a chronic liar.

Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels Why did bobby die? He was hit by a bus

How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

Why didn't the elephant do any tricks? It was dead.

Whats the best ab workout? Solly Twist

Why did someone see a penguin walking in the desert? They were dreaming, because Penguins waddle and live in the Arctic.

Whats white and looks like a bunny? a rabbit

Roses are red Violets are astronaut This joke didn't make sense I'll kill u with a rake

What do you call white people that live in a trailer park? Residents.

Why did Susy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susy.

Why did the chicken cross the road? why? Womens rights

What did the murderer get for Christmas? Executed.

A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Sucks to be a fish.

Pete and Repete are sitting on a fence. Pete falls off. Pete suffers from a scraped knee and a bruised tailbone.

roses are red violets are blue dinosaurs are extinct obama is black

What do you call a homeless person with one leg? Rob.

Wanna here a joke? Feminism.

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

You know why Michael J Fox can dance like it's 1999? because he's a really good dancer.

What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dog

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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