Knock Knock Who's there? No one. You're imagining things.

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How many kids with A.D.D. does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go for a bike ride?

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How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator? You open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door.

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A Chinese man, an American man, and a Mexican man are sitting in an airplane. When the flight attendant comes by with food, the Chinese and American both opt for pretzels, while the Mexican prefers crackers and makes his selection accordingly. The three sit back and enjoy their snacks separately.

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Why did the wife leave her husband? Because they were having sexual differences and time restraints. The husband worked nightshifts as a nurse while the woman stayed home and took care of their child. The husband confessed he never wanted a child in the first place, and that having sexual intercourse with her didn't truly satisfy him.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have narcolepsy.

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What's the difference between you and a mallet with a cold? Ones a sick duck...I forget what I was about to say but your mother is a whore

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What's worse than an explosion? A nuclear explosion.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball. Super Monkey Ball who? No wonder it's super.

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A Jew! Bless you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz 7 8 9

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What'sucks and white Jackson

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Why do Christians believe in God? They made him up

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How did the child cross the road? He couldn't his legs had been lost in an awful car accident that had killed his whole family.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter it's not going to come to you anyway.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? -a black man that left his family

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Rose are red Violets are blue And I really hate you Friends?????

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What do squirrels and Justin bieber have in common? Everything.

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What do you call a new born baby ? Whatever name you and your partner have agreed upon after months of sifting through baby names.

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Your mammas so fat, she weighs significantly more than the average person.

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you: "hey, is your refrigerater running?" random, confusded individual: "yeah" you: "oh."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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give me thumbs up or i'll rape u to death

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What do you get when you put a frog in a paper shredder? Harshly punished by the Animal Humane Society

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops