Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

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Why was the T-Rex so bad at math? Cause it was stupid

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What's Worse Than Unripened Fruit? Crippling Depression.

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When life hands you lemons, you should question your sanity

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? Probably one. Replacing a light-bulb is a pretty simple task which any person (regardless of ethnicity) should be able to do without assistance.

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Two cowboys are in a kitchen. The first one says, "I feel at Home on the range!" To which the second replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he has never pursued his real dream.

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I like my women like I like my coffee, without a dick

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Why did god smite the homosex man with all of heavens wrath? For shits and gigs.

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The dyslexic man called the black man a ginger.

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This is a joke

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Why did the pedophile get arrested? He was driving way over the speed limit.

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What's the difference between a baby and a mushroom? One is delicious, the other is a mushroom.

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Yo mamas so fat that she slowly had developed obstructive sleep apnea syndrome and had died due to an obstruction of her upper airway while she was sleeping.

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Why did the redneck ask his daughter to get on her knees? His shoe was untied.

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic, so to make his activities in the bar into a joke would be disrespectful and inconsiderate.

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Whats small, red and white, and would kill you if shot out of a cannon? A decapitated baby

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What's faster than a Jew running after a penny? A car.

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Why couldn't the Asian drive? He was blind

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Whats worse than eating a worm? Haveing a worm die in your penis.

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what did you call a bench full of white guys? The NBA

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What did Stephen Hawkins say to President Obama? He didn't his computer did.

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Roses are blue Violets are red Crap, I already messed up the joke.

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Knock Knock Whos There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Radley.

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Why did Alex die? He choked on a semi truck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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