What has two legs and is covered in red. Half a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's a black man's favorite food? It depends.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q. what did the kid say to his foreign language teacher about the test? A: i dont understand this test, its like in a complete different language

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Its December 21, 2012. You are still alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

the old man fell down the stairs and broke his leg, he then went to the hospital and got a cast. later that day he went home and ate soup

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did Susan fall out a tree? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Susan

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A black man and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? Nobody, the car is parked while they look at a map for directions because doing that while you are driving would be very dangerous and could result in a collision.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Did y'all see Lafell catch that pass? Neither did I

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Come on, I am trying to cheer you up a bit, honestly how high?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why can't Brent speak at the moment? Because he is eating his ice-cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

When life gives you melons, you're dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

So there are two kids in bumper cars at the local fair. A nuke was set off underground and most of the metropolitan was annihilated.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the Lightning Bolt say to the Thunder Cloud? WATTSup?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

thumb_up thumb_down +7

"Sorry, our servers are being derpy right now. Try to refresh the page, or check out some of our other sites." "Couldn't find the lulz you were looking for. Try to refresh the page, or check out some of our other sites." HORSEHEAD NETWORK... YOU CANT HANDLE THE LULZ! MORAL MAN!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Turnabout: American study of the Japanese Stereotype man: Murican: Excuse me Mr Japanese. Jap: The answer is within the heart of battle.. Murican: Yes but I just want to ask you some few questions. Jap: You are disturbing my feng shui I must power of the mystical fireball of surge fist energy get... *uppercuts waterfall BECAUSE REASONS!* Murican: What? But this is a serious study! Jap: Sowwy I do nothe speeky the shamefull language of the engrish! Murican: But you just said... Sigh... Conclusion: Carpet bombing of Japan funding increased. "slap a Jap" commercial project from world war two reinstated for the safety of the American people. Experiment two: The study of a American man raised in Japan. Murican: Hello I wonder if... American raised in japan: GADOUKEN GADOUKEN GADOUKEN! ORA ORA! Murican: Dead/KO. American/Japan: FRAWRESS VICTOLY! Result: World war 3 GET!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

you know whats funny... nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red Here's something new Violets are violet NOT F**KING BLUE

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Anal

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the mentally challenged man enter the bar? He's tired of being subject hate and criticism. He hates being the subject of jokes and being pointed at. He may not be able to tell you what 3x6 is, but he still has feelings. So because of all these inconsiderate people judging him, he now spends his days at the local bar, drowning his sorrows away in alcohol. I hope your happy.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops