What did the Neo-Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

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In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

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Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

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Why did the baker have brown hands: Because he was black

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what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

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Like CHUCK NORRIS, CHUCK NORRIS like You !

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Whats Brown and sticky... Shit

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What do old people really like? Anal sex.

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Q: Why didn't the Government help the poor little boy? A: Because he was taking a test and that would be cheating.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

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Those days where everything goes wrong, and you think to yourself "I just gotta do whats right here"... ...Sigh... 2. DO YOU KNOW WHY I HATE YOU SO MUCH? BECAUSE I HATE YOU! (Blame is on me, love and hate are not opposites, send me a copy of your book, and ill rip it out for you)

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Justin Littleton's mom accidentally texting him about buying weed, and then offering to buy him ice cream to make up for it.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody, because first, pineapples are too small to fit in, and second, you would drown.

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A man walks into a pole.

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What does 1+1 equal? 2

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What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

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Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

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Why does Marcus keep playing dumb games instead of doing his goelogy. No one knows.

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April showers bring may flowers, may flowers bring pilgrims, pilgrims bring diseases, diseases bring death, death brings... Well it's just death.

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What is a wok? A wok is sumting you twow at wabbits.

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Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

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Knock knock Who's There? (It was a ding dong ditch. Or a knock knock ditch. What ever.)

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Roses are red Violets are blue My dad drinks a lot Help Me

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Why did the room packed with married people seem empty? Maybe they were all playing hide-and-seek. Or maybe the room was pitch black and they were all standing very still and quietly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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