Q: What weighs 6 ounces, is extremely dangerous, and lives in a tree? A: A sparrow with a machine gun.

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Why did the fat guy sit on another guy? They were in a wrestling match.

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Why was the ginger walking around in bare feet? He had no sole.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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You know what's funny? Lot's of things.

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-What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew -The pizza doesn't experience many years of hardship and social belittlement at the hands of a dictator in need of a scapegoat to support radical ideas.

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whats black? a black man

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why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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What do you call a black guy and a mexican guy running down a hill? Two good friends enjoying the countryside together.

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So I was sitting in the doctor's when I noticed a guy sitting about two seats down, wearing a sombrero and pouring salt over himself. Then I found out I had cancer and promptly lost all interest in him.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Anywhere from 2-8, depending on the size of the vehicle.

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Robocop and T-800 argue over who can run the fastest, Robocop claims he is the fastest, while T-800 says that he is the fastest. To settle things once and for all, they start a race. At first T-800 seems to be leading Then the T-800 is leading by a great distance. moments later the T-800 has a huge lead. But then suddenly, without any warning, the race shifts! T-800 is now leading only by a great distance! Yet in a amazing, and completely unexpected plot-twist. T-800 wins! Moral: :O

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Why did the kid fall off the swing? He had no legs.

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Mary had a little lamb... that's what she gets for having intercourse with the farm animals.

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Whats pink and screaming? a skinned baby in a bucket of vinegar+

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Q: Do you know what really makes me smile? A: Facial Muscles.

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Chuck Norris doesn't answer the phone - he doesn't have one at the moment

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25

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Why can't a black guy be the King of England? He's not in line for it.

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Whats worse than forgetting some thing at the supermarket? your nuts being nail gunned to the wall.

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What's worse than an explosion? A nuclear explosion.

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what did tyrone want for Christmas? A dad.

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why did ya dad eat ya food?? because ya sister

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What's the difference Justin Bieber and a Dic* the Dic*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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