Why did the black kid fail his math test? Because he had down syndrome

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What's black and red all over? Half a cat

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A man named Joe has practiced drawing cartoon characters his entire life. When Joe turns 15 he decides to enter a local drawing competeiton. Joe works very hard drawing his cartoon and finally finishes. When it is the time to hand in his drawing his drawing, he hands it in an receives a satisfying 2nd place and continues on with his life. Two years later Joe decides to enter another drawing competeiton (this one much more competitive) after his drawing skills have tremendously increased. He begins drawing and is 3/4 of the way finished when Joe is brutally murdered by a mentally disturbed man and cannot hand in his art work and is therefore disqualified from the competeiton and loses.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got into the car? "Robin, get in the car."

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what rhymes with pirates? not Somalia because i don't consider a inflatable boat a pirate ship.

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Three men of different race and religion are on a plane; they enjoy their flight, and two of them have a good meal with no pork. Thirty years later, two of the men share the same flight, but failed to even recognize each other on the first.

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What did the booger say the other booger? "Is he picking on you again"

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Why did the mother tell her son to get a job. She was tired of buying Generic brand food.

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Why can't vegetarians eat mushrooms because I can't urinate over a scotch bonnet :/

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What do a blond and a jar of marmalade have in common? Nothing, they are completely different.

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Why shouldn't you play poker in the woods? Due to the stereotypical lack of human population in such an area, it would be excruciatingly difficult to find a partner with which to play competitive card games. I suggest trying solitaire instead.

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your momma is so dumb.. ... because she was a slacker in high school but then turned her life around and is now a respected member of society

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Billy: hey dave, wanna hear a joke? Dave: what? Billy: oh yeah, you are deaf.

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25

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do you like walffles?Yes I like walffles!

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whats a cross between michael jackson and arnold shwarzanegga? Michaelwasanigga

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Republicans

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So a mama tomato, a daddy tomato, and a baby tomato were all walking down the street. The baby tomato was falling behind its parents. So the daddy tomato goes back, squishes the baby tomato and yells ketchup!

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Why was the presidential candidate sad? He mother was raped on her way to hear his speech and his brother hung himself in his apartment two days earlier.

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what do you call a black person in the dark? ........invisible

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Has anyone seen that clown that hides from gay people in Tesco's

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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer? This would be unlikely to happen, as it would cut the story short.

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One day a man woke up and decided that he was going to do something with his life. He then got a haircut, took a shower and bought a nice new suit. After that he went home and cleaned up his whole house and invited his parents, that were not very close with him, over for dinner.An hour and thirty minutes before his parents got there, he went to the store to pick up some food to prepare for the very important dinner. On the way home he see's a homeless man walking on the side of the road. The man felt bad for him because he was poor so he gave him $10. He then proceeded home to make the dinner. The dinner turned out very well and he went to bed a better man.

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Why do Southern guys go to family reunions? To connect with their loved ones, meet any new additions and share old family stories.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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