Why did the mother tell her son to get a job. She was tired of buying Generic brand food.

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a man walks into a bar the other man ducks

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing

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Why did the black man begin to cry when his friend aimed a gun at a watermelon? Because if he were to shoot it would be a waste of perfectly good food.

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a bald man walks into a hairdressers and demands beans on toast.

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Why do Southern guys go to family reunions? To connect with their loved ones, meet any new additions and share old family stories.

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*******A CELL JOKE******* Mommy Ribosome and Daddy Mitochondria are watching baby nucleus play around in the cytoplasm, when all the sudden baby nucleus falls down and breaks its cell wall. Mommy ribosome is like freaking out like, "OH NO< WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WE NEED TO TAKE HER TO THE E.R.". Then Daddy Mitochondria says, "The smooth ER or the rough ER???"

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what do mexicans like most. icecubes

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When is the best time to eat? When you feel like it.

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What's red and smells like a rose? Bumble-bees licking honey off of a stick.

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If you have 24 hours to live what would u choose to do? I would choose to take stander ised testing b/c it feels like it's forever.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Pen. Pen who? Pen is blue.

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Knock Knock Who's there? its the police mam your son has been killed by a hit and run driver, the driver was an alcohol

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Flying aboriginal on a magic carpet

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why does it suck to be a black jew you get the back of the oven

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guess what my nephew said today? oh ya i forgot, hes dead..

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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Did you hear the joke about the deaf kid? He didn't either.

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whats the difference between black people and dogs? people actually care when something happens to a dog

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What did the blind football player say to his coach? I cant see

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Why was six afraid of seven You would be scared to if your name was six and you knew someone named seven

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Why is Santa's sack so big? He has a malignant tumour on his testicle. We're all very worried about him.

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Why was the kid happy? Because it was his birthday.

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Men, get on the boat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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