Chuck Norris can count from 1 to 100... twice!

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Therefore no one knew why his name was Fuzzy Wuzzy.

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Why are Asians so good at mathematics? Practice.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Your mum. Your mum who? Dinner is ready, come down stairs.

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What did the young girl say to her step-dad? Nothing. She no longer talks to him after years and years of sexual abuse which left her emotionally scarred.

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im the real danny hamilton you stupid asshole

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i drive all the time its no big deal open the door and get behind the wheel

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What word is ten letters long and starts with gas? Gastronomy.

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why did timmy die he was shot in the head by terrorists

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Why did the wife leave her husband? Because they were having sexual differences and time restraints. The husband worked nightshifts as a nurse while the woman stayed home and took care of their child. The husband confessed he never wanted a child in the first place, and that having sexual intercourse with her didn't truly satisfy him.

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How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

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What's funny? At the exact moment you read this, someone is suffering from domestic abuse.

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A black man, a Mexican man and a white man walk into a bank. The black man reaches into his bag and pulls out his bank card, the Mexican and the the white man do the same as they need to withdraw money.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One splatters and makes a big red mark on the ground when dropped from a building. The other is a fruit.

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What rhymes with shuck and starts with an f flamethrower

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What did the blind football player say to his coach? I cant see

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What's red and smells like a rose? Bumble-bees licking honey off of a stick.

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Whats green and has wheels? A Rednecks front lawn.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? A: A dog

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Q. What do you call 2 black men on a bike? A. Organised Crime

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The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

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Women's rights.

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What is one plus one? I don't want to do math.

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What is worse than going to school without your homework? Going to school naked without your homework.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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