Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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i ate and i ate and i was sick on the floor 8x8=64

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What do u call a man with no arms and no legs and is laying in front of a door? Matt

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What do you call Michael? A homosexual person who is nice, however he is still gay.

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whats big fat and very annoying your little brother

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What do you call a 6 year old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor.

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knock knock who is there? Jehovah's Witness... IT IS the desire of Jehovah's Witnesses that you become better acquainted with them. You may have met them as neighbors and fellow employees or in other daily affairs of life. You may have seen them on the street, offering their magazines to passersby. Or you may have spoken briefly with them at your door. Actually, Jehovah's Witnesses are interested in you and your welfare. They want to be your friends and to tell you more about themselves, their beliefs, their organization, and how they feel about people and the world in which all of us live. To accomplish this, they have prepared this brochure for you. In most ways Jehovah's Witnesses are like everyone else. They have normal problems—economic, physical, emotional. They make mistakes at times, for they are not perfect, inspired, or infallible. But they try to learn from their experiences and diligently study the Bible to make needed corrections. They have made a dedication to God to do his will, and they apply themselves to fulfill this dedication. In all their activities they seek guidance from God's Word and his holy spirit.

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What did Jesus say last before being nailed to the cross? I don't know, It never happened. ...Why did he say that? He didn't, it's not real.

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a fat old hobo named da'shovant'e ate a bucket of fried chicken then killed a little girl named poopface McFergusen

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A young boy walks into a bar and asks for directions or a map. The bartender takes him into a backroom and gives him a map he just happened to have. The boy continues on his way and the bartender is happy that he did a good deed.

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So in Jimmy's school if u are misbehaving u are asked to get out of the room. Jimmy was in science, and he was throwing paper a bunch. Then his science teacher says, "Jimmy, do u wanna go out?" Jimmy replies "No thanks, I'm 14 and i have a girlfriend." That's how Jimmy got detention.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? Jews are people

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Why can't the man have babies? His nuts was cut off and he eventually bleed to death.

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What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Being a Japanese person in Hiroshima on this date.August 6, 1945

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a guy walked into my house and asked "why do you do the beep test every arvo?" i suddenly replied, im matt minors i get chicks

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Knock knock Who's there? Batman Batman who? Because he was

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A guy walks into a bar... Ouch

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What was so special about Anne Frank's diary? Nothing. ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Why couldn't the asian man drive? He had no arms.

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why did the polar bear bury his face into snow? because he saw the 241543903 post and wanted to join in so he used a portal gun to teleport his head into some guy's freezer.

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girl: why do you love me? boy: i don't.

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A man walks into a bar. I forgot the rest of the story but the punchline goes something something something something your mom is wwhore.

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Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No Neither have I

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Whats the difference between an oven and a fridge One is hot and the other is cold

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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