What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They were baked until the baker them until they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

I was sitting next to a man with jelly in one ear and peanut butter in the other, so I turned to him and said "Are you a trifle deaf?" and he said "No, I'm mentally ill."

whats red and looks like a bucket? a red bucket whats blue and looks like a bucket? a red bucket in disguise

why can't a blonde count to 70? cause 69 is a mouth full

F: what is BLUE and has 400 whells ? Q: NOTHING !!!

A black guy gets a job...

Your mother is a stupid bitch. For real.

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

what did the fish say when he was eaten by a shark nothing fish cant talk

What is green and looks like Grass? A painting of grass

What can fly for only a short period? A jumper.

Why did the clown fall off the swing? Because he was dead.

What did the Jewish man say when he answered the phone? Hello?

Knock Knock Who's There AT&T Guy Mom it's for you

what happened after 9/11?? 9/12.

Why did Robert fall off his bike?? Because he was a potato.

What's fourteen inches long and purple and can make a woman scream all night? crib death

Why did the chicken stop in the middle of the road? To get to the other side.

Women's rights

NASCAR

Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. It is ignorant and offensive to judge the world of cardinal numbers, where protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary, by the standards of human societies.

Q. What roles did girls play in the Gold Rush of 1849? A. Miners.

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Norris? well no one knows for certain, but they do know there's alot of fridges involved

Why did the homeless man get a house key cut? He didn't he's homeless.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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