How do you make a wall a darker shade of red? You throw the baby harder.

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Why did the clown fall off the swing? Because he was dead.

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How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

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In Soviet Russia, it is the largest country in the world. A lot of the parts are uninhabitable though.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A jew is a person contending to the faith of Judaism, and a pizza is an Italian flat normally round or square baked good consisting of dough, tomato sauce, cheese and various spices, and is sometimes enjoyed with toppings such as meat or vegetables.

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a hobo begs and begs for a dollar to buy something. a man finally gives him a dollar. what does the hobo buy? nothing. he walked into 711 and got shot.

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F: what is BLUE and has 400 whells ? Q: NOTHING !!!

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Random Guy: "Oh god, why was I born with so much common sense?" God: "You must be mistaken, or else you wouldn't be asking me."

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How do u put an elephant in a refrigerator? -open it up and put it in How do u put a girraffe in a refrigerator? -open it up take out the elephant and put it in All the animals it the world are at a party in Florida. Which one didnt go? -the girraffe, it was in the frige Your trying to cross a river. A sign says alligators everywhere. U have no boat and no bridges. How do u get across? - swim the alligators are at the party in florida

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Guess what? Holocaust

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Whats worse then getting stabbed in the trachea by a aids infected knife? getting pounded anally by satan

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No, Trinidad.

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Rose's are red, Violet's are blue, I have a gun... Get in the van!

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Q. Why does Samuel Jackson always play a black guy? A. Because he's black.

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who's best is friend is really good looking? James Cornish

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Norris? well no one knows for certain, but they do know there's alot of fridges involved

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care?

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

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What happened when john pelted susie with a rock? she had a temporary concusion, needed eight stitches and John was grounded

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jamie looks at jacob for arousment. jacob looks at his dog.........

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What do u get when u mix a dinosaur and a lesbian? A-lick-alot-a-puss

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Why doesn't Rosa Parks eat bacon? Because she's dead.

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i once thought i could do crytal meth but then i thought naw better not

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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