why did the iraqi woman bury her wedding ring in the ground? because it's the only way she could properly pay respect to the death of her husband who recently died in a group suicide bombing.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Well babies don't have the strength or coordination to hold a paint brush, so you may need to call some painters.

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A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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Hey I just met you, and this is Crazy, but I think I Love You, so have my baby! ;)

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Joke: What do you call cheese that's not yours? Nacho Cheese! Anti Joke: What do you call cheese that's not yours? Sally's Cheese

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This is a joke setup.

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How do you keep a black man out of your back yard? Tell him to go away.

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Cleveland winning something

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Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

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Dogs in my home.

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Why don't women need watches? Because most people carry cell phones that tells them the time making watches redundant and obsolete.

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Why did ned fall out of the tree? Because he was hit by a koala.

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Why did they bury the pope on the side of the hill? Because he is dead

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why did the man jump off the building? to commit suicide.

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Why did John stay home from school? He died.

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hi

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<3 ... it looks more like scissors than a heart...

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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Your mom.

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whats purple and savage? Barney!

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What do you call a pair of owls? Two owls.

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Batman and Superman switched sidekicks. Superman didn't want Robin.

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Hey i just met u And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey i just met u

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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