How do you become thinner in a week? Stand in front of a Bulldozer.

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why didn't the drug addict take steroids? he was going to but died due to years of substance abuse

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Everyone is amazed because he can now walk.

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why was the man a redneck? because he got sunburned at the nascar race.

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Those days where everything goes wrong, and you think to yourself "I just gotta do whats right here"... ...Sigh... 2. DO YOU KNOW WHY I HATE YOU SO MUCH? BECAUSE I HATE YOU! (Blame is on me, love and hate are not opposites, send me a copy of your book, and ill rip it out for you)

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knock knock whose there?? seth oh, come in

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What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

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a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

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What did the blind boy get for christmas? harry potter transcribed in braille so he could enjoy such a magical world like the rest of us

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What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

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Q: Whats the difference between a guitar and a piece of ham? A: You can eat a piece of ham.

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obamas trench

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What is round and will hurt you if you step on it? The sun

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Where does a homeless person live? No where

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Surprise mother father (A+)

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What is a wok? A wok is sumting you twow at wabbits.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? *cause 7 8 9? NO cause 7 was a nigga!

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Dislike if you shag sheep ;)

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? He was hit by a bus!

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What did the redneck say to the Muslim? Nothing, he is too blinded by racial hatred and ignorance after terrorist attacks on the U.S to speak with him despite having common interests, such as baseball.

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a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

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Whats worse than dying? Nothing, really.

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Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

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What do you call a black man from Germany? A Germ.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops