Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: A penguin in a blender.

How do you make time fly? You throw a clock out a window.

3 thieves are also murderers and naked at the moment.

A son went to ask his father about his thoughts on abortion. "Dad, what do you think about abortion?" "Ask your sister." "I don't have a.."

if u like this i wont pay you a dollar

What's brown and sticky? Shit

Why was Michael Jackson seen shopping at Kmart? Because he heard little boys pants were 50% off the original price.

3 friends are out camping. One says to the other "It sure is a great day to go fishing." The other says "Yes indeed." The third one says "I agree." After a few minutes of hiking, they go to lake and begin fishing.

A scientist walks into a bar. His forehead becomes swollen.

Well educated black man.

Knock knock. *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

What starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? F*ck

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because seven, eight, nine.

Guy 1: why are you such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most p***y

its was amazinglysmooth fuck off

Your mama is so fat she suffered from diabetes and died of heart failure .

Roses are Red Violets are Black Why is your chest As flat as your back

I'm not late, I'm fashionably tardy!!!!

What's worse than a snake in your boot. A boot in your snake.

What's black, brown and red? My dog as a serial killer

your momma so dumb she put a battery up her but and said i got the power!!!

A horse walks into a bar. Being unable to comprehend human emotion, he shits all over the floor.

What happens when a black man falls out of a tree? He gets hurt.

How do you get your little brother to stop kicking you? Stick his feet in the garbage disposal.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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