Jennifer Kim is the nicest person I have ever met, everyone loves her.

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how many aliens does it take to change a light bulb? i wouldn't know, i have never seen one and there is the off chance that they don't even exist

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how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

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The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

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How do you unclog a toilet? You call a plumber.

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Whats worse than an oompa loompa a black midget

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Ask him to come down.

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What smells like peanut butter but looks like a penis? A penis, I lied about the peanut butter.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Bushes are Red, Trees are Red... my garden is on fire...

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How many dead babies does it take to paint the side of a building? I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

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What is different between a pile of dead infants and a red ferrari? Being the victim of a mass murder.

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What do you call a pair of banana peels? Trash.

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"Knock, Knock" "who's there" "John doe" "John doe who" "I told you my my name was john doe"

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What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jam is slightly more viscous and may contain bits of fruit.

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Why'd humpty dumpy fall of the wall? Someone threw a fridge at him

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Knock knock. Who's there? Pete. I'm here to tell you that your entire family just died in a car accident.

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Because he was dangerously fatigued from staying up all night weeping passionately into the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of twenty years after the CEO of the company declared bankruptcy and finding out that his only daughter was in the hospital in critical condition after her school bus flipped off a bridge.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 Because 7 was a registered 6 offender

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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roses are red violets are blue ur family is dead and u will die too

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What do you call a joke without a punchline?

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Question: Whats worse then getting hit by a bus? Answer: Getting hit by a train.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck at poetry, show me your tits!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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