Knock knock Who's There..... Guess who's coming Who's coming Me inside you !

Today is my birthday.... Goodbye cruel world

What's round and bounces A basketball No!!!!!!! You dummy!!! Then what? Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Q: Do you know what really makes me smile? A: Facial Muscles.

Jimmy was skipping in the park one day when a young boy stopped him. "Hello there, would you like to be friends? We can go behind the old oak tree and play soccer!" asked the boy. "Ok!" replied Jimmy, and they went off together to play. The so-called 'young boy' was actually a wanted midget rapist. Jimmy was brutally raped and filmed. The film was later uploaded onto the internet where it blew up in a matter of weeks. Jimmy had to move schools 6 times and had to go to counselling every week. He finds it hard making friends and later went on to become a heavy cocaine addict.

Q:If an apple and an orange had a politicial debate, what would it concern? A:Nothing important.

Graphed: hey kids it's time to grape ya in the mouth Girl: noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Random guy who sponsors the comercial: why is she screaming isn't thus about our new grape drink? Grapist: well… yes but look at the wY she's dresses she totally wants it.

How do you you know when you haven't slept in a while? You're tired.

once upon a time there was a boy

So what makes you that much adaptable? I get the feeling I should get this by now.

Who has fair skin, blonde hair and is African? Stefan.

Q. What did tthe little kid say when the bully punched him? A. Ow.

.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a whore.

How do you kill a retard You give em a kinfe and ask who's special

If an ear could talk what would it say? Probably nothing because it doesn't have a tongue...

What happened to the clown that touched the kid? The clown got honked up

How do you get rid of door knocker? You run at them with a chainsaw.

What are vampires favorite drink? Vampires aren't real.

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

I'll be back. Please use the door.

Q: A Jew lost a penny, a nickel, and a dime. If he found the nickel and the dime, what didn't he find? A: The Mesiah

why did the frog cry? Because he didn't get a message

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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