A man walks into a bar...... He then wakes up in a hospital. along with a large bruise on his forehead.

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Why wasn't my T.V. on? Because I didn't have a remote.

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There are two muffins in an oven. The first muffin says, "Is it just me, or is it getting hot in here?". The second one says, "Hey, look! A talkin' muffin!".

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What is matt dalys favorite thing in the world? penis

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What do the words lightbulb and lightweight have in common? The word light is in both words. Other than that absolutely nothing.

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Random question: Whats black and white, green, and black and white? Well thought out correct answer: 2 zebras fighting over a pickle

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- My grand mother died. - I'm sorry.... Did She died of old age ? - No, she got eaten by a giant worm.

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Yo mommas so fat... that when it was rainning, she put on her rain coat and went outside, everyone was saying that the sun came up

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The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because while he was swinging, his friends dared him to jump off and called him a chicken when he didn't. Still hesitant, he tried to jump off, but his arm caught on the swing chain and he fell face first into the tanbark. He needs reconstructive surgery to repair his face.

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Why was the boy sitting alone? Because all his friends died.

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black guy graduating high school

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your moms face is turning purple. I'm coming for you.

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I walked into a bar the other day and ordered a double. The bartender brought out a guy who looked just like me.

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Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

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What do call a limbless man swimming? Dead.

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What really puts a kick into both my life and the lives of others around me? My leg(s) of which recieves messages from a sophisticated bundle of "wires" in my cranium that enables it to act at all.

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Now Showing: EVIL SLOTHS II "The worst death is a slow death."

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How many chairs does it take to screw a lightbulb? One, if you have enough lube.

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Why was the Mexican in pain? Someone hit him with a frying pan 5 times across the face.

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i lost the game

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Whats worse than forgetting some thing at the supermarket? your nuts being nail gunned to the wall.

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A man laughs creepily and another man asks him what he's doing he says I have a creepy laugh so the man asks him why he was laughing the man says there's a boy over there that has a frog stapled to his face!!!!!!!!!

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Goldilocks walks into a bar. But its not really a bar, it's a bear cave and she is eaten by porridge eating bears.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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