What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the bottom of a pit? Whatever his parents named him.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

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What do you tell a Woman with black eyes? Nothing you've already told her twice.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he needed to get to the store across the street.

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Wanna here a good joke? Sure, but you spelled hear wrong.

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What did the skeleton say to the vampire? Nothing because a skeleton wouldn't have a larynx.

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What happens when you shoot a bear and you kill it? It dies.

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Why was the asian boy made fun of in the locker room? Because of the nipple piercing he had.

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What do you call a cow climbing a tree? Amazing. How many cows have you seen climbing trees?

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What do you get when you cross sodium citrate, citric acid, benzyl alcohol, monoethanolamine, sodium benzoate, gylcol disterate, FD&C Yellow #5, ammonium lauryl sulfate, methylisothiazolinone, fragrances/perfumes, FD&C Blue #1, sodium chloride, zinc pyrithione, methylchloroisothiazolinone, ammonium xylenesulfonate, ammonium laureth sulfate, cetyl alcohol, cocamide, guar hydropropyltrimonium chloride, 1-Decene, homopolymer, hydrogenated, trimethylolpropane tricaprylate and water? Head & Shoulders Dandruff Shampoo for Fine-Oily Hair

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when the teacher asked jimmy if he was a girl jimmy felt very scared because his teacher had no mental problems.

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A bear is chasing a rabbit through the woods. The rabbit stumbles into a genie while coming to a clearing. The Genie says, "I will give you both three wishes." The bear thinks quickly and says, "I wish every bear in the forest was female." The Genie then grants the wish. "And...now I wish that each bear in the country was female!" The Genie grants the wish. "AND I WISH THAT EVERY BEAR IN THE WORLD WAS FEMALE!!!" the bear exclaims, now getting overly excited by his wishes. The Genie grants the last wish and then turns to the rabbit. "Your turn." The rabbit wishes for a pair of running shoes and the well being of his family and friends. For his last wish he points at the bear and says, "I wish he was gay."

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What do the poor have that the rich need? Nothing.

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Why are you late? Sorry, I would have been here sooner, only I wasn't.

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Now Showing: EVIL SLOTHS II "The worst death is a slow death."

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Muslim athletes.

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What goes up and does not come down? Why the hell ask me.

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if life thows you lemons ILLUMINATI CONFIRMED

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What did the autistic child say to the doctor? Nothing. His condition is so severe that he is mute and may never talk for the rest of his life.

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Rishi is a funny guy, well he thinks he is. true story.

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When life gives you lemmons Give lemmons Life

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If you have 24 hours to live what would u choose to do? I would choose to take stander ised testing b/c it feels like it's forever.

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Republicans

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What's the difference between a duck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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