Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

I'd feel bad for some skinny guy who lived in a very obese family and only got hand me downs.

Why aren't there alligators in a bookstore? Because alligators would pose a danger to customers.

how do you fit 100 babies in a bowl? with a blender. how do you get them back out of the bowl? with tortila chips.

What's poor and lives in Newry city council dump? Smelly mcD

what do you call a man with no legs? An ambulance as he seem to be bleeding very heavily.

Why did schlomo fall off the swing He lost balance because Muslims threatened to kill him

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because seven, eight, nine.

Tell me a joke Tell me a joke! TELL ME A JOKE!!! ...Womens Rights

Why is the post under me so funny? Because the boy won't be able to play the x box!

Roses are red Violets are blue Vodka is less Than dinner for two

Q:Why did the chicken cross the road A:He didn't he was tortured then killed and turned into a sandwich that you can buy for the price of $1.00

(read this aloud): A man walks into a bar with a giraffe. Him and the giraffe order multiple shots and get hammered. The giraffe on the other hand can't hold his liquor so well, and ends up passing out on the floor of the bar. The man decides to leave him there and take off. On his way out, the bartender yells, "Hey, you can't just leave that lyin' there!" and the man says, "It's not a lion, it's a giraffe!"

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumbty took a great fall Because he was terribly intoxicated And failed to properly balance himself.

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

Q: A Jew lost a penny, a nickel, and a dime. If he found the nickel and the dime, what didn't he find? A: The Mesiah

Why did the house stink? There were decomposing bodies under the floor boards.

Why wasn't the girl raped? Cause she wasn't attractive.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being held for random.

what did hitler say before he turned on the gas who are you calling a dick dina

YA MAM, is a very nice person

Why did Osama bin laden plan 9/11? Same reason Justin bieber was born....

Where did the homeless man sleep? A rather nice hotel with fluffy pilloes

Your momma's so fat, her doctor seriously recommends that she lose weight for the sake of her health and happiness.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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