What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Provolone

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how do you blindfold an asian...a piece of dental floss

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What is an old ginger lady's favorite type of bread? Whole wheat.

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there are two kinds of people in this world: those who like anit jokes and those who don't

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What's a worse feeling than an upset stomach? Seeing a child getting molested and not saying anything.

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Could switching to Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? Yes.

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson who? Shut up and give me ma dam candy women!

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Why couldn't sally go on the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock Who's there Sally

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who is the wildest wild one? matt daly

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Best joke: Okay so I got a joke for ya but it is pretty long so bare with me please. First off, you must have heard a knock knock joke before and you must have a huge sense of humor. So this guy walks into a bar and orders fried chicken wings with hot fudge and vinilla drizzled all over it with a cherry topping. The bartender says, "We don't have that." The guy thinks of anything else he'd like and says, "How about a bucket of turkey and jalapeños?" The bartender looks puzzled and once again says, "This is a bar..." The guy is now paranoid and says, "Fine, I'll just have a thick, juicy, chicken thigh but please remove any excess skin on it, it's unhealthy and I'm on a diet." The bartender slowly removes his apron and walks out of the bar shouting, "I QUIT!" The guy sits there on the barstool laughing as a lady bartender comes to him. "So sorry sir, what would you like? From our bar that we have available?" The guy stares at her, squinting. "By any chance do you know if you have the punch line to this 'joke' because I sure dont." Slowly the woman removes her apron and walks out of the bar. The guy grins, walks out, and says, "job well done today. Where to tomorrow?"

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck would? Probably a lot of wood.

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Six Jews get on a train. They all safely arrive at their locations.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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why is a bad joke like a dull pencil? cuz thers no point!!!!

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what did johnny's mom do for his 50th birthday? she died

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If Jimmy has 50 pieces of candy and eats 40 of them, what does he have now? Jimmy has diabetes.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? because she was SHITFACED!!!!

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A man walks into a bar.....OW!

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What was the pirate's favorite letter W

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it.

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What happened to the village that got swept by a tsunami? It was destroyed.

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Is this the krusty krab? NO! THIS IS red lobster, how many i help you?

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Why can't Albert Einstein hold down a job? Because he's dead.

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What does the funeral director say at a jewish funeral? Ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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