What has two legs and is covered in red. Half a dog.

Why did the whale cross the ocean? To reproduce as a way of life.

Ya know what's sad? You can only submit one dislike on this website.

What does the funeral director say at a jewish funeral? Ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes...

What did the fat man do when someone told him he was fat? He kept eating, for he was deaf.

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

Tom and Phill are eating ice cream Tom challenges Phill to a contest to see who can eat their ice cream in one bite Tom finishes his in two bites Phil in one Then he looks like he got a brain freeze Tom notices and says "You idiot: you got brain freeze!" Phill turns around and says "No, I have a brain tumor."

what is the difference between Stephani and a whale? A whale is skinnier... get the harpoonns

"I can sell this watch for $500 dollars on the black market!" Well, you could sell your liver for $500 dollars on the black market too.

Roses are red Violets are blue God makes things beautiful... What happened to you

Why do Vampires Sparkle in the Sunlight? They don't read a proper Vampire Novel and see for yourself.

Why did the mentally challenged man enter the bar? He's tired of being subject hate and criticism. He hates being the subject of jokes and being pointed at. He may not be able to tell you what 3x6 is, but he still has feelings. So because of all these inconsiderate people judging him, he now spends his days at the local bar, drowning his sorrows away in alcohol. I hope your happy.

Q: wanna hear a racist joke? A: sure RB: You're pathetic!

Yo momma's so fat, that she was put in this joke

Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them, they die.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Billy. Billy who? Billy your next door neighbor, I need to borrow some sugar. Ok, come in.

How do you drown a down syndrome child? Put him/her into water.

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Wanna go bike riding?

if a fat man in a red suit puts you in a bag at night. its not santa your getting raped

A scotsmen, an Irishman and an Englishman all walk into a bar. The publican had accidentally left the door unlocked and the bar was in fact closed. So they left.

Grab your Taco, you've pulled a dyslexic Mexican

What does a gay horse eat? HEEEEEEYYYYYY!

You cant like my stuff ive known you for like 1 day. just kidding you can like whatever you want, actually ive know you for 5 years

why is a bad joke like a dull pencil? cuz thers no point!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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