your mum

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what did tyrone want for Christmas? A dad.

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Flying aboriginal on a magic carpet

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Q: why do irish people like swimming A: because it's fun

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Why do white people go to black people's yard sales? Because they know they sale good quality stuff -Travis

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roses are red violets are blue i am muslim

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What is a long boring story that no one will ever want to read? the life of Sarah Palin.

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25

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guess what my nephew said today? oh ya i forgot, hes dead..

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you are black i am black except for your big hairy ass

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How do you silence a barking dog? You rip out its vocal cords.

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What did John say to Trojan? Hi Trojan

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"Do you live in the United States?", said the man. "no." said the other man, "cool beans", said the woman.

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Why does Michael j. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses the finest ingredients

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Why did the guy crash his car? Because he didn't want to crash his truck.

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Two chemists walk into a bar. The first one says "I'll have some H2O." The second one then says "I'll have some H2O too." Both chemists live as no bartender is irresponsible enough to serve liquid hydrogen peroxide in a public bar.

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Q: Why is my friend gay? A: Because i slept with him.

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SCP-009-J is missing. Where has it gone? Is it under the table? Was it sat upon? Is it there on the ceiling? Is it under the rug? Was it gobbled right up by a quantum pillbug? Did it run through the tunnel? Did it fall down the stair? Was it sent back in time to a carnival fair? Did it get on a train to a far-away place? Is it locked in a falsified beacon from space? Did it fall in the oobleck and [DATA EXPUNGED]? If it clogged up the sink, will it have to be plunged? Just where has SCP-009-J gotten to? Oh wait, that's right! SCP-009-J is you!

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why was the boy sad. his father is an alcoholic that beats him daily.

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? I agree to the terms of service.

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What did the T-rex say to the elephant? i like bananas

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What really puts a kick into both my life and the lives of others around me? My leg(s) of which recieves messages from a sophisticated bundle of "wires" in my cranium that enables it to act at all.

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Why did Santa's little helper feel depressed? Neurotransmitters essential for happiness, such as serotonin and norepinephrine, were in rather low supply in the poor elf's brain.

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Roses are red violets are blue if you were number one I"ll pick number two, if you were number two then I'll pick POO!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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