Q: If Hitler spots a jew, what will he do? A: You suck at history dude, Hitler is dead! Moral: What? You did not get the daily news?

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Why are old people such terrible drivers? As we age, our eyesight slowly deteriorates and our reflexes become slower. So, in order to be cautious, the elderly avoid high speed chases and such to maintain their and others safety. Or they could have alzheimers and not realize they are in a moving vehicle at all, it's really a tossup

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what do you call a black man on crack? a crackhead.

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What is worse than having sex with a dead baby in front of it's mother? Not a lot.

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I died shortly after writing this.

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I like my women like I like my coffee, without a dick

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Cat got your tongue? Punch it in the face, and retrieve your tongue.

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What's the difference between Chuck Norris and broccoli? A lot.

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What did the doctor say to the camel with no hump? You're a horse.

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What did one prisoner on death row say to the other? Can you please clean off the seat when you're done? I'd like to die in my own urine.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I am a dog

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Why did god smite the homosex man with all of heavens wrath? For shits and gigs.

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What do you call the man who graduated medical school last in his class? Doctor

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What do you call it when someone walks on another person's head? It depends. Face up, fetish. Face down, hate crime.

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What stands on the corner oof every major city at night? A cop

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What do you call a guy who can't get a girlfriend? Me.

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Woman Rights

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colby doesnt shave

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What is a person who can hold there breath for an hour? Dead

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Two men are sitting on a park bench discussing the anatomy of goats. Where is Bertha? Teaching the principals of mathematics to blind orphins in Moscow, Russia.

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What did the Pope say to the little boy? Look both ways before crossing the street

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Why did the Jew have very bad gas? He had very rough anal sex and air got stuck up his bum

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Whats small, red and white, and would kill you if shot out of a cannon? A decapitated baby

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roses are red violets are blue I forogt what I was doing where am I?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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