Q: Whats the difference between a friend and a bestfriend? A: The other one has best in front of it dumb A$$

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What did the black man say to the other black man? We are both black men.

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What's red and eats tulips? Your face!

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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-_- i like trains ... -_-

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What did Jesus say last before being nailed to the cross? I don't know, It never happened. ...Why did he say that? He didn't, it's not real.

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A man see's a bird and tries to get its attention by whistling at it, much like if it were a dog. The mans whistle fails to get the birds attention because birds have wings and dogs do not.

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Six Jews get on a train. They all safely arrive at their locations.

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Little Johnny was always bullied at school. Everyday he would get picked on by the same kid, Todd. Todd was a red-headed bully with no discipline. Johnny one day went home and started crying. His father asked the little boy, "Jonny why are you crying?" John replied, "I keep getting bullied". His father stood up and told him, "You must become a big man and step up to him and tell him how you feel. It will surprise him and he will then back off. It always works." Johnny then felt inspired. Later that night he started practicing what he will say in the mirror. By the next morning he felt like he was ready. Johnny was confident about himself for once. He walked up to Todd and told him, "I'm tired of your bullying and next time you will regret it!!". Todd looked surprised and had his jaw opened. Todd then said, "I'm sorry Johnny I didn't know you felt that way." Johnny looked confused. "Here come with me and I'll buy us ice cream". When they went to go get ice cream, Todd brutally stabbed Johnny until he was losing blood and repeatedly raped his dead body.

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Three women are sent to heaven. Theres a blond , brunette , and a redhead. There are 100 steps to heaven and on every step god tells you a joke and you cant laugh. The redhead makes it to step 23 then laughs. The brunette makes it to step 67 then laughs. Finally the blond make it all the way to the 100th step and before god can tell the joke she laughs. God asks why are u laughing? And the blond says " i just got the 1st one"!

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? a deer...

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jay hefti is so cool and alex askew is hot

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What's made of wood and has an eraser? a 2x4 i lied about the eraser.

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How old are you? 20

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Rabid squirrels attacked Blake's face as winged pickles perched on Phoebe's hair.

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Violets are Blue, Roses are Red, skip the bull$%!#, and give me head

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Hey I just met you, and this is Crazy, but I think I Love You, so have my baby! ;)

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how do you blindfold an asian...a piece of dental floss

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Doctor: "I'm sorry, but your son has Hepatitis B. Asian Parent: "Why he has Hepatitis B? Why he not get the Hepatitis A plus?"

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Why did the woman lie down? She was dead

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Anal

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how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

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Are you from Tennesse because my uncle grew up there and I was wondering if you knew him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is a highly unlikely circumstance due to the fact that there are no wild chickens and most chicken coops are nowhere near a road

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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