A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic, so to make his activities in the bar into a joke would be disrespectful and inconsiderate.

What do you call a dead baby lying in the road? A Tragedy

whats the difference between a white kid a nd a puerto rican kid? one smells fine and the other one smells like he walked out of a butcher shop that sells cigars and cheap prostitutes

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.????????

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was crudely stapled to another chicken who insisted on doing so.

The dyslexic man called the black man a ginger.

Why cant steve get a job? Because Steve Jobs is DEAD! Moral: And people are all like "you gotta respect the dead", uh... Why not respect people while they are alive? Humanity is so fucking "smart" sometimes ya? Not that your answer matters...

What do a black man and an apple have in common? They are both carbon based life forms.

Why did the little girl fail her test? Because she had mental retardation.

What is black and blue and red all over? Rihanna

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You were adopted and I couldn't think of a good way to tell you...

Why was Bootylatrice tardy for school? -She overslept.

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? In this situation, the minority.

What is the difference between a mustache, and a pile of dead babies? Mustaches disgust me.

Chinese drivers.

In Soviet Russia, millions of innocents died due to the oppression.

What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

Why is Kony hated by the kid with ADHD? Hey look a kid being raped while watching his family getting killed.

Why did the cow have a pain in his stomach. It has testicular cancer.

What got stolen from the poor boys house... Nothing, he was so poor that he couldn't even afford any thing

Do you have liquid tape? No ( But he really did)

A caterpillar and its mom (a butterfly) come upon a lion eating an antelope. The caterpillar says "Mom, why is the lion so mean to the antelope?" The mom replies: "it's the circle of life." The next day, the caterpillar and his mom witness a bird of prey swooping down and eating a mouse. The caterpillar asks why the bird of prey is so mean and the mom responds by saying its the circle of life. The next day, the caterpillar and its mom come across a trail of dead animals. They follow the trail to the end where they see a great lion. The mom opens her mouth to say its the circle of life when her son jumps up and eats the lion. THE END.

vaginas

Why did the jewish man pick up a nickel on the street? Because he understands the value of saving money.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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