Q. What does a blonde and beer bottles have in common? A. Nothing. Blonde is a hair color and beer bottles are inanimate objects used to contain various brands of beer.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

roses are red voilets are blue my dog stinks and so do you!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A depressed gay illegal immigrant walks into a bar and the bartender asks why he's sad. The man replies "I'm the most unwanted man in America."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the man say after falling off the bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a terrible and painful death on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because her dad through a fridge at her

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the cat land on it's back.... because its dead .......

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, oceans and beaches are both not alive, thus incapable of speech and feeling emotions

thumb_up thumb_down +17

An atheist walks into a church

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's worse than a dead baby? 2 dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down +17

if life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians

thumb_up thumb_down +17

a guy jumped out of a plane...he died

thumb_up thumb_down +17

whats long and green? weed

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is a black guy's favorite hobby? Stamp collecting.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

O: How do you kill a black man? A: Shoot him

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do u call a black man in the middle of a crowd of white men? A rare sighting of a black man trying to go to colledge.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the chicken sneeze? Because someone put pepper on its nose.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

some of these so called "anti-jokes" are real joke s- they don't belong on anti-joke. they are very funny but are traditional jokes that use cliched non-sequitor as punchlines.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you keep a puppy warm? You throw it in the fire...

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a blue baby at the bottom of a pool? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

I win an iPad for pooping on someone's head Answer- We have a muddaf**kin winna

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? usually one new yorker.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why do woman travel in packs? because men don't travel like the sisterhood in the traveling pants

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops