Why should you paint a canoe black? Being the darkest color, it will hide dirt, scratches, and normal wear and tear on your canoe better than lighter colors.

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What kind of car does Yoda drive? Nothing, Yoda doesn't exist.

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A dog walked into the forest and saw a whale in a puddle

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your moms face is turning purple. I'm coming for you.

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How many women's right's leaders does it take to change a light bulb? None. They can't change anything.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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Man 1: Your lifes a joke Man 2: Your talking to yourself Man 1 klled himself Man 2 had cancer

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Knock Knock. Whose there? ..............

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Knock knock. Whos there? The police, your wife is dead. The police, your wife is dead who? Sir, this isn't a joke.

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what did the jewish kid get for his birthday......Striped pajamas

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Donald Trump

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What do you call 200 black people dead in the ocean? It's a start.

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Gotta go Fast Gotta go Faster Faster Fasterfasterfaster! Moving at the speed of sound I'm the quickest hedgehog around Got ourselves a situation Start getting a new location Without any explanation On top of relaxation! Go- Go- Go- Don't blink Don't think Just Go go go go G-g-g-g-go go! Sonic, he's on the run Sonic, he's number one Sonic, he's coming next so watch out for Sonic X! Gotta go fast, gotta go faster faster faster fasterfasterfaster Go go go go go go go go go! Sooooniiiiic X!!

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a bald man walks into a hairdressers and demands beans on toast.

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Q: What is that white stuff in chicken shit? A: Thats chicken shit too

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*******A CELL JOKE******* Mommy Ribosome and Daddy Mitochondria are watching baby nucleus play around in the cytoplasm, when all the sudden baby nucleus falls down and breaks its cell wall. Mommy ribosome is like freaking out like, "OH NO< WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WE NEED TO TAKE HER TO THE E.R.". Then Daddy Mitochondria says, "The smooth ER or the rough ER???"

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing

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a man walks into a bar the other man ducks

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Why did osama bin laden cross the road? To commit suicide

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A midget walks into a bar. No one cares.

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When is the best time to eat? When you feel like it.

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Fitzsimmons. We met at your wife's work party.

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Why was the kid happy? Because it was his birthday.

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What are the two biggest jokes in College Football? Auburn and Florida! Roll Tide!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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