This guy dies and his wife gets him cremated. She takes the ashes home and lays them out on the table and starts talking to them. "You know that fur coat you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money. You know the new car you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money." Then she whispers, "You know that blowjob I promised you? Well, here it comes..."

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What's faster than a black guy with your TV? Probably someone who doesn't have to carry such a heavy object.

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What did 6 say to 7? Nothing, numbers are abstract concepts thought up by humans and therefore, they cannot speak or converse in any sort of language.

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what did batman say to robin before getting into the car? get in the car.

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A man walks into a 1980's style restaurant he takes a seat and orders his meal.

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Izzy and Zayn Malick got married. Then Zayn asked for a divorce due to their age difference..

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banana

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. Now heres a boy who can't read. Ngjmhgmgk? MTGKMJHGMjhkmjh(hgjnhgfjhgfj nj nvj vj kvnmg ifh) njki nj jo ncj kgjkfngjfk jkn jkgfngkfn gkn kgfnigkfnmg km kgf kglfn kglf kglgkflnm klnm mklm khlgfpnkmfklnmlk mbk lm klgfnmk gfmkngfnkgfklfknm m k kf mkfl m k gflmgkffmkopfdjtorper srhes hngfdlj;sdnht rktrtnr rdpkng ngngf.

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what did the duck say to the hawk? quack

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Why did the man mow his lawn without his shirt on? Because it was very hot out.

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Surprise mother father (A+)

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Whats Brown and sticky... Shit

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Why did Charlie Sheen laugh at the TV? Because there happened to be a comedy on.

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Whats tan and jumps higher than a frog? Mexicans..

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why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was a Women

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What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Get me a sandwich, bitch

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What do you call a black man from Germany? A Germ.

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Why did the Dr love drop hit guitar? Because a bear walked into a bar and killed everyone in there including dr love and was then shot to death by police and animal control.

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Why did the girl suck the other guy off? to get paid

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Who let the dogs out? The pet shop.

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What did the cat say to another ? meow

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What can be worst than letting someone you dont know run a chainsaw? Letting Smokey Dokey run a chainsaw!

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Why did the Koala Fall out of the tree, It was Dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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