a man walks into a bar. ouch.

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The other day, I broke my snare drum.... I still haven't fixed it and am planning on doing so soon.

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What is the difference between a plum and an elephant? One is purple, and not an elephant.

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Yo momma's so fat, she slipped into a diabetic coma.

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My life sucks, I'm about 20 years old, and i haven't changed aged for 15 years, I'm stuck in this dead end fast food job, my colleague hates me, my boss is a money crazed freak, my best friend is a mentally retarded immature weirdo and to top it all off, I live in a pineapple under the sea.

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A Jew! Bless you.

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Why couldn't little Sarah smell the roses? Her face was mauled by a grizzly bear

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Whats the difference between a horse and a snake? A snake is poisons, a horse is not.

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A poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe into the nearby river when taking a particularly forceful swipe at the tree he was cutting. He felt so dejected he wept. Then, the goddess of the river appeared. "What ails thee, my dear man?" she asked. "My axe -- it fell in the river!" stuttered the weeping woodcutter. "Do not worryI am the goddess of this river, and will find your axe!" said the River Goddess and dived into the river. After waiting eagerly for several minutes, the woodcutter was resigned to the fact that he had imagined the River Goddess.

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Why was the 45 year old man crying? He shit his pants.

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Why did the yeti make an omlette? To practise making omlettes.

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Your mama is so fat that when she farted she called it global warming

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What did the bodybuilder do when someone stole his wallet? Ab workouts.

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One day my dog ran away. We drove around for a long time looking for it.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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stuarts mum

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Why do Christians believe in God? Because they're stupid

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A man walks into a bar and gets drunk. He then goes home and proceeds beating his many wives in a drunken fit of rage.

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How many women's right's leaders does it take to change a light bulb? None. They can't change anything.

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Why did Lil wayne decide to be a rapper? Because he would earn a very large amount of money and fame.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? cheese.

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hi

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An ordinary man, much like your friend Brad from that one place where you used to hang out, was walking along one night, much like that night last week, and saw a star. He then wished upon that star...and kept walking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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